R.I.P. TODD SOBIEK - LOVE EVER, MCGILL

another one down..
i just read, in these amorohous pages no less,
of a friend's death.
it happened just a little ways away
on montegut street, in the infamous purple house
that bastion of death and foul air
i saw him
just the other day..
i put a steaming cup of coffee
in front of him
we whiled away a few hours
talking
telling the stories
of how we met
of how long we had known each other
both coming here from the same town
we told someone (who was it now?)
the story
of why he called me mcgill
he sang the song, rocky raccoon
he was there-
now he isn't,
ever.
now no one will ever call me that again.
that was his name for me
he will never again tell
the story
of how and why he came to call me that.
or the story of why he showed up
covered from head to toe in blue
why he painted himself blue one day
and went walking.
fucking overdose, another
in a long string
of friends lost this way.
the endless trail
of hapless dead.
i thought he had been clean
for ages..
i don't look forward
to the task
of telling his other friends,
i hope someone knows
how to find his mother
and his father.
this is the worst thing
that could happen.
i'm choking on this
on these unexpected tears
on this unexpected wash of grief.

i swear,
he was just here.